Short Week

I've had a short gym week and I'm kind of disappointed about that. The gym was closed on Monday for Memorial day and on Tuesday, Matt forgot to leave me the car seat. I did go yesterday and today. 


I forgot to write about yesterday's workout, again. Sorry about that.


                                                                                     Yesterday
I did my usual cardio work out. The only thing different about it was that I didn't read while I was walking. I used that time to think. Over the weekend, my mom had informed me that my biological father had passed away. I used my workout time to think about that. I tried to figure out exactly how I felt about it. The walk seemed to still go by pretty quickly. Reading or thinking, I still wasn't focused on the time I had left on the machine.


After my cardio I began my strength work out. I used that to help me sort out my anger towards my bio-father (more about that in my other blog).  I didn't get it all out, but I felt much better.


                                                                                         Today
I had a good workout today. Cardio and back workouts.


While I was walking, a woman got on the treadmill next to mine. All of a sudden the woman lost her balance and almost fell off her treadmill. She scared the crap out of me. She looked pretty shaken up too. Luckily, she didn't fall and she wasn't hurt.


                                                        

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Call Me Crazy!

I sat down to write today's entry, but, I really have to shower first! I shall be back to explain!




I don't think a cold shower has ever felt so good.


Today has been a great day! Mike spent the night with my Mother in Law last night. That allowed me to sleep like a rock last night. I woke up at 7 am and then again at 8am. I enjoyed my peaceful breakfast and then headed to the gym. I walked my 60 minutes, the same way I always do. 


While I was on the treadmill I noticed a guy who was a couple treadmills down from me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw his arms start to wave around. I almost panicked. I thought he was having a seizure. When I turned to look at him, I realized that he was just...dancing(?). He must have been listening to heavy metal or something. I chuckled and kept on walking. I also noticed a teenage boy during his training session. I thought, "Now that kid is good motivation". Here I see a kid, who is spending his summer trying to get into shape! GO KID! If a teenager can give up some of his summer 'time', there is no reason we can't all do it!


After the gym, I headed to my Mother in Law's house to pick up Mike. I was so hot from my cardio (and sitting in traffic in the heat), that I was really hoping to find them in the pool so I could jump in and cool off. Unfortunately, they were not in the pool, however, she did invite me to stay for a couple of house so that we 'could' swim. HURRAY! That water felt SO, SO, SO great! We dried off in the sun for a little bit, then headed home. Mike passed right out in the car (we knew he would). 
                          
                                                                           (This is not me! Yet....)


When we got home, Mike laid on the couch and went back to sleep. I then decided to do something nice for my husband. I went out and mowed the grass for him. What in the world was I thinking?! Ha ha. I don't regret it. He really and truly appreciated it.


I have been thinking about buying some resistance bands and a weight ball to take with me on our vacation. There is no LaFitness where we are going, bummer. I will be missing a whole week of going to the gym. I need to prepare for that and figure out an alternative. Maybe, if I am lucky, I can find an old friend that has a gym membership and some guest passes! I'm worried that if I loose a whole week of gym time, I will get unmotivated and won't want to go back. Eep. I can't let that happen.
                        

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Another Day, Another 2 Pounds!

Hurray Hurray, I lost 2 more pounds yesterday!


I know I shouldn't weigh myself so often, and I did not plan on weighing myself until next week. But something was drawing me to the scale this morning. I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and stepped on the scale. I opened my eyes, looked down, and WOOHOO I was down another 2 pounds. I was pretty excited. I was more than happy to go to the gym this morning. I had a feeling that things would only get better after Tuesday and they sure are!


I read over my old posts yesterday. It was almost hard to believe how far I have come in a short time. I may not have lost a ton of weight but I am definitely strengthening my body. Back when I first started going to the gym, I would only walk for 30 minutes while I was there and another 30 later that night. Now, I go and I walk my full 60 minutes at one time. It was nice to see that I am making changes.


Changing my diet to lower my carbs has not been as hard as I thought it would be. It will be even easier once I go to the store and stock up on fresh vegetables and other low carb foods. I'm really happy that I can eat cheese again. Oh, how I love cheese. This weekend, we will be in Illinois for a baby shower. It will be my first real challenge! I will be good!


I did my usual cardio at the gym today and worked on my legs. I did 210 lbs on the leg press today. For some reason, they all seemed a little harder. It is probably a good thing. I felt the burn in my legs while I was on each machine. While I was on the leg press I noticed an older guy helping a girl work out. I assume it was his daughter or grand-daughter. After a couple of minutes, they walked past me and the guy shot me a look and said something to the girl, who then looked at me as well. I did not hear what he said because I had my headphones in, but the look on his face did not look like he was complimenting my workout. I shrugged it off and continued on with my workout. A little bit later I was on the leg curl machine and he walked past me again, with another hateful look. What the heck? I didn't do anything to this guy. I don't even talk to anyone at the gym other than my trainer. Who knows. I won't stop me from doing my thing at the gym, unless his eyes can shoot lasers that will melt the fat from my body. 


I am also going for another walk with my mother in law this evening. More cardio!!


I feel great and I am doing great! I excited for the future and to see my results after another month!


                                                                    

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I Can Feel My Muscles Growing, Am I Green?

I dropped Mike off at the Kids Klub and headed to the dressing room. I got my stuff together, locked it up and headed upstairs. 


I got on the first treadmill I came to and punched in my incline. It did not incline, so I got on another one. Same problem there. I finally found one that inclined. I did my 60 minute walk, the same as always (3.0 mph and a 5.0 incline). 


After my cardio I went downstairs to do my strength workout. I worked on my back and biceps today. While I was doing my bicep curls I saw a little hint of a muscle moving around in my arm. I smiled a little. It helps motivate me when I can spark little daydreams about what I might end up looking like. 




I won't be achieving any high weigh loss numbers before my vacation this year. But, by next summer, I will look like a whole new person. It seems like it is such a long time away, but next summer will be here before I know it. 


                       

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What Has 2 Thums and Does the Happy Dance?

              THIS GIRL RIGHT HERE!

                                                                   

I am so insanely happy today! I got the scale this morning and it showed that I lost 4 lbs. I was thrilled. 


Mike and I took off for the gym early this morning. My training session was at 10am so I wanted to get there by 9 to complete my cardio before hand. We ran a little late so I was only able to do 40 minutes. I walked for 40 minutes at a 5.0 incline and a 3.0 pace.


At 10:00 AM I met Ben on the floor and informed him that I left my log book at home (ops). I also told him about my weightloss (finally). We sat down and talked about a couple of things and than we took my measurements. 

After that we began the workout. We did chest today. Luckily it wasn't as intense as last time. THANK GOD! I still had a good workout though. And It lasted longer than usual. 

After my workout I went back upstairs to finish my cardio. I did another 20 minutes at the same 5.0 incline and 3.0 pace. I think something may have been wrong with some of the other treadmills I had been using. There are times when my walk seems a little harder and I can actually see and feel the incline and there are other times when I can't tell at all. Today I definitely had a good working treadmill because I literally had sweat drip from my face onto my shirt.

Today was an amazing day. A day where I actually saw that my hard work is paying off. I definitely could not have done it without my trainer. Ben has been great at keeping me motivated and helping me stay on track. He gives me great workouts that I can use when I am on my own and is always more than happy to answer any and all of my questions. Briana has been a great help too. She takes time out of her day to do research for me to make sure I am doing things the right way. I am so thankful for them both!

                     

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Hello, Hello, Again. Shaboom. Shaboom.

Friday

I went back to the gym on Friday, to make up for abruptly leaving early on Thursday. Since Mike is out of school now, I took him along with me. On our way to the gym, we stopped by the store so that I could buy some new work out pants. By the time we got to the gym it was 11:20am. The girl in the kids klub informed me that I only had 40 minutes until they close. I decided to do my strength workout since I could do cardio at home. I did my leg work out. I even put the leg press machine at 210 lbs again. It wasn't so bad. I think it was the squats that about killed me last week.

Changing My Diet

I changed my diet a little more starting today. I completely redid my FitnessPal profile. It actually lowered my calorie allowance to 1240. That's okay, though. I am going to do what I have to do. I am more determined than ever. Along with sticking to my calorie budget, I am going to watch my carb intake. Matt and I sat down and talked on Thursday about my eating. I was sticking to my calories but I was eating a lot of carbs. I have also given up soda. Only water for me now. I have been soda free since Thursday. I don't really miss it much, until I look in the fridge and see them. I won't give in though. I need to go buy a low carb cookbook so it will make things easier. I think it will be easier after my next grocery shopping trip. Then I will have more food that I will be able to eat.

Today

Mike and I went back to the gym today. We got there early so that I would have time to do all of my cardio. I am now going to go to the gym 5 days a week. Monday and Friday will be cardio only days. Tuesday-Thursday will be strength and cardio. I got on the treadmill and began my walk. I walked at an 5.0 incline and a 3.0 pace. My plan was to do 60 minutes on the treadmill and then 20 minutes on the stair master. Unfortunately, when I got done with the treadmill there were no stair masters available. Oh darn! You can imagine how upset I was by this (cough cough).

I also got a pedometer app on my phone to track my steps. Now I just need to get an arm band. I'll pick one up when I go to the store today. My mother in law are going to start walking in the evenings as well (whenever she can). We are meeting up today at 4:30pm to walk a very nice path. We are taking Mike and Savannah(our dog) with us. My mother in law says that Savannah is getting fat and needs to walk too. 

Next Summer, my parents are going to be having a vow renewal ceremony. My sister and I have been planning this for a while now. Unfortunately the bridesmaid dresses that my mom picked out are the kind that look terrible on me. I have 1 year to do everything that I can to loose all of this weight! Maybe, for the first time in my entire life, I will end up looking better than my sister. :)

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"I'm in the Middle of a Break Down"

Went to the gym this morning after dropping Mike off at school. I began my cardio at my new 5.0 incline. I got 30 minutes of it completed before it was time for my training appointment. I went downstairs to the training desk and waited for my trainer. He was a little late, which was no big deal. Apparently, there was another schedule mix up. He told me 11:00am but put me in for 10:30am, or something like that. So I get another free session. I asked him if we could at least check my body fat to see if it had gone down more. You can imagine the shock I felt when I saw that it had actually gone back up to the original percentage. I couldn't believe it. I bit my tongue and held everything in for as long as I could. Ben made the comment that it bewildered him. He saw me every day I was in the gym and he knows how hard I am working out. He questioned me about my eating habits, asking me if I 'really' was eating well. I swore to him that I was. Matt can verify this. We rescheduled my appointment for Tuesday and it will be an hour long session to make up for today. He changed my cardio a little bit. He wants me to do 20 minutes on the stair master (god, help me) and the other 40 can be whatever I want (treadmill).  


At first I thought, "okay, no session today. I'll do my own workout, no biggie". That all changed after we checked my body fat. I walked back to the locker room to get my phone for my music. I ended up just breaking down. The tears just started pouring from my eyes and I couldn't stop them. I was so angry that I just threw everything into my bag and walked out. I couldn't believe that after working so damn hard to lose weight, I had absolutely nothing to show for it. What the heck is wrong with me? I was heartbroken and disappointed. I felt like a complete failure. 


I got to my truck and called Matt right away. He tried to calm me down a little bit. He wants to look at my carb in take and see if that needs to change. It might not be a bad idea. Maybe I should also get my thyroid checked.


I cried more as I drove home. I decided to swing by a friends house for a little more venting and comforting. She really helped. She swore that she could see a difference. I don't see it.


My mother in law and I are going walking this evening. Maybe she can help me with what I am doing wrong. Someone has to be able to figure it out so that I can change. Right?


Regardless of all of the disappointment I felt today, I am not giving up. I am determined to lose this damn weight. I want to be happy with the way I look, and I will get there, dammit! God, help me, I WILL reach my goal!




                                                       

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A Not So Great Start To My Day.

Today started off terrible. I weighed myself again and...nothing. I was extremely upset about it this morning. As I walked out of the bedroom, into the hallway, I wanted to just sit and cry. I feel like people think I'm eating more now that I'm exercising. What else could it be, right? Well I'm not. I am sticking to my 1300 calories a day and not even eating the calories I burn during my workout. 

Despite how terribly pointless I felt it was to go, I still went to the gym this morning. I won't stop going. It made me feel better, emotionally. I also have a very good support system. I have a lot people who are constantly encouraging me. Briana, thanks again for talking it all through with me today. You always know how to help. :)

I increased my incline again today. I walked at a 3.0 pace and a 5.0 incline. I think I will slowly keep bumping it up. After cardio, I went downstairs my strength work out. I worked on my back today. Instead of 3 sets of everything, I did 4.

There was nothing really exciting about my workout today. Well I saw one chick in a tiny pink tank top with her leopard print bra showing, a lot.  It looked kind of trashy. Yea, I would totally dress that way to the gym if I could pull it off. If I tried it now, it would probably look like an actual leopard was in the gym and that might freak people out, a little.


I have another session with my trainer tomorrow. Oh joy, I can't wait (just a little sarcasm there). Of course it is on a leg day again, meh. Hopefully, I will be able to walk this weekend.

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